And It's Saturday

Minds are like parachutes. They only function when they are open. -Sir James Dewar, Scientist (1877-1925)

The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made. -Groucho Marx(1890-1977)

Well let me discuss the big topic and answer the big question that everyone would like to know. Where in the world is Dustin? I am currently residing in... da da da... Orlando. I indeed did not go home on Thursday night as I was planning. I had missed the flight. I almost no effort to make it there on time. I can't leave. I have responsibilities and obligations here that I must take care of and fulfill. I signed a contract stating that I will be here until January 3rd. Then there's my friends here. I know some of them are leaving but not all of them are. With Jeremy self terminating it's going to be rough for Jenn. I'm not meaning to sound all super important but she's going to need a good friend and I can't walk out on her. The other Rangers have their own "others" that they will be spending the grandeur of their time with where as I don't. My other is at home in PA, waiting patiently for me to return. Jenn is one of the most important people to me and I want to be here for her. Hopefully I will be able to help her make through until January. I'm going to miss Jeremy. It is going to be very weird without him here. His absence will be noticed more than any other.

Other reasons for me staying are this: 1.) it's too late to enroll in school for the semester, so I'll be going home to a ton of spare time. 2.) While this may not be a huge source of income it still at least an income, where as if I'd go home I would have none. I refuse to live off of my family and this boy has bills. Lots of 'em. 3.) I've not yet made a decision that I regret and I don't feel like starting now. I can't make a rash decision, I need to think it out clearly and fully. 4.) If I had went home this weekend and decided to not stay at home then the likelihood that I would be able to return later this month for Daniel's birthday would be grim.

I feel badly though because in some ways I feel like I'm walking out on everyone back home. Daniel says I need to come. He was very angry when I decided to not come and it started a huge fight. I feel it very selfish of him to be angry with me, yet he has a right to be slightly upset. In a way my decision to stay has selfish qualities but this would be one of the few if not the only selfish decision I've made. People who know me can tell you that I usually buckle under the pressure of trying to make everyone else happy. Oh the decisions to make.

So Thursday I was given a break from strollers and was sent to Electric Umbrella (EU) where I was placed on the counter with Ranger Racheal Dick. On my way to EU I ran into Troy and I informed him of my intentions of going home. I could tell that he was hurt that he wasn't informed but to be fair I didn't tell anyone. I just posted my thoughts about it in here and who ever read about it knew. Jenn was one of the last to find out - which I feel horrible for. I wish I would have been able to tell her myself. So when I actually make a full decision I'm going to keep it to myself until I can tell the important people. Troy gave me reassurance that I would make the right decision because he knew that I would think it out clearly. When people say that it then puts so much pressure on you to make the right decision. He'll be pleasantly surprised to see me on Tuesday. I then went out with the Rangers to PI. Sarah text Rachel Hovik to ask her if she was self-terminating and she said no. We all had a great night and had tons of fun.

Friday I didn't do much of anything. I got home from the prior night at about 2:00 in the afternoon and then just relaxed around the house and took it easy. I wasn't feeling well. I was also given word that Rachel Hovik did indeed self terminate on Friday. She saw Natalia and told her she was on her way home. What a liar. So she either lied to Natalia or Sarah. Which will it be? Tuesday will tell.

Today I went to bed super late/early this morning, 930 am. I couldn't sleep. I so wasn't tired. I slept for about 2-3 hours and then lied there for 1-2 more before getting up and getting shower. I needed to catch the bus and head to Wal*Mart to do some grocery shopping. I planned on making dinner for Jeremy & Jenn tomorrow so I called them to find out if we were on for tomorrow when they said they were on their way to the mall. So instead of going grocery shopping I hung out with them at the mall all day. We then went out to eat at UNO. Good food. Great service. We had the best server - Danny (aka Bob) hehe. He was fabulous. I will definitely return there to eat and hopefully he's working so we can have great service again and again. We got a picture with him. hehe I'm such a picture whore. Jenn - thanks for dinner and thank both you and Jeremy for such a great day and evening. I love you both.