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Dustin's Diary

A look at the day's happenings and thoughts. ~Read at your own discretion. This blog is from the mind of the author and contains opinions that are of the author. It is no way endorced by any other company or any other body.

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Location: Rimersburg, Pennsylvania, United States

I am an enigma. A perfect right hand middle man living safely supported on the edge. Complicatedly simple or simply complicated, that's for you to decide. I lose the games I play & win the ones I don't. I'm not here to play games. I'm here, there, everywhere. Often I like to feel as if I'm the world. Other times I want to melt into the scenery. I see myself as a familiar stranger standing along the street as life speeds by. I like strangers & love my friends. I laugh when people fall but offer a helping hand. I hate people but love working with the public. The Constitution is wrong, all men are not created equal; they should be. I believe that not everyone has the same opportunities; it's what you do with the ones that lay before you that determine who you become. I like to walk. Running is too fast; but some roses are meant to be seen & not smelled. Time is an illusion created by man. I’ll create it for those who are willing to do the same. Your birthday is important to me & hope mine is to you. I tend to give more than I receive. Respect & appreciation are key. Conversation is a gold mine; knowledge is wealth & power. My intelligence is my most prized possession, don't insult it.

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

The Stone Path

I walk a stone path
My bare feet feeling the way
Every smooth stone
And every sharp

I continue forth
Winding thru the forest
Every turn brings a new view
Both wondrous and woeful

Patches of thick weeds come about
Full of thorns and malice
They hide views and paths
Bringing a greater sense of discovery

Along the way flowers are found
Some budding, others in full bloom
Their vines intricately intertwined
Among the stones and weeds

There are hills to climb
With unstable slopes
I look for sure footing
And roots to grasp

At the crest of a hill
The trees thin and end
And a meadow is found
I can see for miles in the distance

The grass is soft beneath my feet
And the breeze gentle at my back
I take it all in and enjoy it
Then I must reenter the woods

Time passes and the forest grows dark
The path unsure
Yet, moonlight filters thru
Illuminating the path with its flowers and weeds

I walk the path alone
Choosing the way at every fork
Only pausing for a moment of contemplation
And return to my solemn journey

This is my path to walk
My path to forge
To suffer and enjoy
This is my life

© Dustin H. Best

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

My Epoch

"And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years." - Abraham Lincoln

"Age does not protect you from love, but love to some extent protects you from age." -Jeanne Moreau

Yes, yes, after nearly a year of hiatus I am indeed posting a blog. I guess the question is, are there still readers? Do people still periodically check in to see if I have made a post? We shall see. We shall see.

This particular post will not act as a medium through which to catch up on the past nine months of my existence. That will come at a later date. Rather, I want to articulate the past few weeks; my epoch.

Life plays its cruel jokes on everyone, it just seems to us that some people are the brunt more than others. But is that a fair assessment? It appears that I have fallen pray to the paranoid delusions that are befitting of someone who would be longer in the tooth than I am. At the age of twenty-five, I am suffering what one might call a quarter-life crisis. I can not fully explain why I feel so strongly about it, but it has been my stern suspicion that turning twenty-five has ruined my life, and for reasons of a great variance.

One of the most incessantly nagging is that I am unsure that I have accomplished anything worth noting an eulogy thus far. I know, my eulogy is quite far into the not so distant future. But is that guaranteed? I can not shake the nagging feeling that I have wasted the past several years of my life. Perhaps I should have applied myself more in high school. Maybe the right path for me was to take up culinary arts school after graduation. Could the Army have been a big mistake or was it a necessary stepping stone? Does Disney and ISV really look that great on a resume? Have I truly gained anything that would be worth not getting through school quickly, settling down, and making a happy home? My life of no regrets is starting to fail me, and that is where I feel so ruined. The philosophies that serve as the very core of my being are being tested and I am realizing that there may be cracks in the foundation of my sole.

On the flip side, the lessons learned through all my experiences are invaluable pieces of knowledge that could not have been gained otherwise. I have matured and grown in ways that I never knew a person could. My summer in South America allotted me insight that I could not have found settled down in Pennsylvania, or anywhere else in the United States (those insights will filter through in the subsequent post). Disney lend me opportunities that thousands of people could only dream about. During both periods of time I met some of the most interesting, intriguing and amazing people. People I feel honored to know and call a friend. My choice to prolong school was beneficial because I had ample time to ponder my future. I knew that I had to choose carefully. If there is one decision that should not be an impulsive one, it is the decision of your future (unless, of course, you choose to be a stand up comedian). So why should I regret any of those choices?

My time in the military is dear to me. It was a time in my life where I was struggling to belong to something. My enlistment only quenched that thirst for a short period of time, because I realized that the something I wanted to belong to could not be found there. In some facets I still long to belong to something. I continue the quest to find what it is. Though, perhaps I already know the answer.

Sunday, April 02, 2006

Cats & Dogs

"We can have facts without thinking but we cannot have thinking without facts." - John Dewey

"Let us take things as we find them: let us not attempt to distort them into what they are not. We cannot make facts. All our wishing cannot change them. We must use them." - John Henry Cardinal Newman
It's true. When it rains; it pours. There are those times in one's life where everything seems to be going wrong and no matter what you try, it just doesn't get better. There's no umbrella that will keep you dry from the downpour of the injustice that is life. It just keeps coming and the waters rise -- you feel yourself begin to slip under -- the end is near -- but then there is that moment; that glimmer of hope -- where the rain lets up, the waters calm and you see the sun -- you feel the warmth and then it happens -- the lightening strikes and the tsunami begins. That's the moment you see it, the true unfairness that exists.

It's at these moments that one truly questions themselves and all they embody. Doubts in your mental and spiritual stability surface while questions of your character and being resonate inside and your emotions seem to be failing you at every corner. You realize that no one is going to save you; it's your own strength that has to carry you and if you don't muster up the courage to swim hard -- you will drown.

Here's where you call me pessimistic. Here's where I call you a fool. While optimism and hope go hand-in-hand; pessimism and realism are two different things. I face the facts. While most dwell in the delusions of hope and faith (only to be crushed by them later); I prepare myself for the truth. For instance: A woman finds a lump in her breast. It may be nothing and that's what people will assume and think while ignoring that fact that it may not be. Then when it's discovered it is indeed cancer, they're all shocked and horrified. But then they move onto the next facade thinking everything will be ok. And when she dies they're grief stricken. They should have faced reality in the first place and prepared themselves for possibility of the inevitable. Now I'm not saying that you shouldn't hope -- but don't ignore that facts. The cold hard truth. This is life people, and it's unfair, face it.

Monday, March 27, 2006

Original & Accurate

What type of Fae are you?

Saturday, February 25, 2006

Cowboys and Angels

Have you ever felt that life was passing you by? Did you ever feel like there was something missing? If you knew what that something was would you know where to look for it? Would you even know where to begin?

Did you ever feel like you were missing out? Did you ever feel like you didn’t belong? I used to feel that way, big time. I thought that by changing the way I looked and dressed I could plug all the gaps in my life. I wanted to be a part of something - anything. I didn’t care what. I didn’t care how. I thought that I could buy a style; a style to change me. Create a new me - make me someone else. It was only when I realized how wrong I was that I suddenly saw the person I wanted to be looking right back at me. Now for the first time in my life I can see what is beautiful, and what’s really important; and it’s all around. So close, I just have to reach out and it’s there. I’ve found my voice.